April 20, 2005

other people's money...

the capitalistic buzz. how do you describe the subliminal? hadn't occured to me till i found myself once again, whipping out the plastic to rack up some more must haves. wtf. am i the brainwashed drone i think i am? i can't paint. i really want to do stuff myself but i painted the entryway to my new home. i did the suckiest paint job ever...there is all this trim and i went slow and did my best but i screwed it all up..

so after hating looking at it for months, it looks like i got drunk with a paintbrush in my hand, i paid a friend to paint it, rip out the carpet, stain the concrete, paint all the trim and put up crown molding.

the thing is i'm having anxiety attacks already. it's day one and a half and he's primered and painted and did a really nice job. fixed all my obvious screw ups... it's just that he still has all the long arduous tasks ahead and in my mind he's far exceeding my payroll projections at the rate he's going. ugh, i think i just need to press ahead and enjoy not having to have the sore back and know where every goof up and patch job is. but the tight ass can't spend a nickel great depression child within me is completely constipated from the regularity of visa going zip zip.

never a more true statement than this one, "IGNORANCE IS BLISS".

wish i knew a LOT less in general.


Posted by shoe at April 20, 2005 10:06 PM | TrackBack