April 10, 2006


the setting is cracker barrel, sunday evening...packed to the hilt with little old ladies.

waitress bending over to fill alleycat's water, "Let me fill up your drink, there, darlin."

alleycat, "bow-chicka-bow-wow"

me (red and paralyzed with discomfort)

waitress, "excuse me?"

alleycat, "BOW-CHICKA-BOW-WOW," in a more twangy guitar tone.

trueblue, "our mom HATES it when we sing that"

waitress (staring directly into my eyeballs) "well, uh, i guess so"

ugh, "bow-chicka-bow-wow" was the opening line to an article about love accidently read aloud within earshod of the boys months ago. like anything, seemingly harmless at the time, it caught on like wildfire and now i am repeatedly being serenaded porn music by my two very young boys.

bless me for i'm not the preverted white trash that i do appear to be. i know how it looks, but the boys know not what they sing. forgive us all. and be careful what you say in front of kids, except my kids. anything would beat them singing this. hug your gardener today! BOW-CHICKA-BOW-WOW!

Posted by shoe at April 10, 2006 11:51 AM | TrackBack

I'm not sure I understand yet (despite a quick Web search) what the link between porn and that catch phrase is. A waitress at Cracker Barrel seems an unlikely member of the clued-in congregation. She probably just thought the kids were making an irritating noise. I wouldn't read too much into other people's glances. She probably just noticed how humiliated you seemed and was expressing sympathy, not scorn.

To the pure of heart all things are pure.

Posted by: Bob at April 10, 2006 01:13 PM

LMAO! It's been a LONG time since I heard that catch phrase/song. Had I been there, I would have had to keep from laughing.

Posted by: Dana at April 10, 2006 01:38 PM

At least he didn't serenade the Cracker Barrel lady with our boys' favorite Pixies tune. "Whores! Whores! Whore in my bed, whores in my head, but HEY! Where! Have! You! Been!"

Heh. I laugh just thinking about it. ;)

Posted by: kelley at April 10, 2006 03:41 PM

So now you hafta tell me about Bow-Chicka-Bow-Wow in Austin. I learned a new C&W song for the Blown-eyed Blodger Meet. Christina told me Zonker has to sing it with me.

Posted by: Denny at April 10, 2006 09:25 PM

I can't sing worth a damn. But maybe I'll lip-synch. At some point I will, however, be hosting a screening of some kids frolicking around and singing a sweet melody. It's a delightful film.

Posted by: zonker at April 11, 2006 07:24 AM

BYW - any of the grownups around here want to explain things to Bob. He's led a sheltered life. Until he was corrupted by Shoe's kids, that is. Hahaha!

Posted by: zonker at April 11, 2006 07:25 AM

... what fond, fond memories...

Posted by: Eric at April 11, 2006 08:40 AM

Zonker - The song is about gay cowboys.

Posted by: Denny at April 11, 2006 09:42 PM

Yeah, I remember...remind me to give Christina a hard time about that one.

Posted by: zonker at April 12, 2006 07:33 AM

... well, at least we aren't goint to bastardize "Gin and Juice" again....

Posted by: Eric at April 12, 2006 06:05 PM

Bow-Chicka-Bow-Wow indeed.

As Art Linkletter used to say, "Don't kids say the Gawd-damnedest things?"

Like when Elder Daughter ordered a beer at a rib joint when we took her to dinner. She was two years old...

Posted by: Elisson at April 12, 2006 09:11 PM

Hey Zonk, that hurt. I'll have you know, I'm just a perverse as the next guy -- just a little behind on my porn-song listening at the moment.

Posted by: Bob at April 13, 2006 09:57 AM

bow chicka bow bow

classic porn guitar

Posted by: barry at April 16, 2006 01:33 AM